Hello everyone, the Historian here–finally remembering to write this introduction BEFORE Ketina has to post an entry! We’re in the second half of this story of Ice Warrior machinations, so let’s get to the episode! This episode first aired on 15 February 1969.
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H = Historian
K = Ketina
R = Ronelyn
P = Photobug
A = Altair
E = Ezio
Cz = Cz
K: Slaaaaar
H: <Ice Warrior whisper voice> “That’sssss my naaaame. Don’t wear it oooout.”
R: Yeah, Slar was having a couple of sexy sexy moments in this episode. “Recalibrate. Hssss hssss hssss hssss.”
P: Yes. We had an attack of the sound effects this week.
R: No, the sound track was definitely stalking them through the air ducts.
P: Ductssssss
R: Not to mention the point at which it ambushed the two old guys in the control room back on earth.
P: It’s good to see the moon base has naval base wheels.
R: We got them surplus.
A: I was terrified the wheel was going to let out a big squeak when Zoe moved it.
R: Seriously, who puts 50 pounds of torque on a thermostat?
K: So the foamy stuff. We got foamy stuff again.
H: <old cowboy voice> Yeehaw, we haven’t gotten a good Doctor Who foam party since Fury of the Deep! Yeehaw!
R: <computer voice> “Blight is spread-ing rap-i-dly in Lon-don and Hel-sink-y. Plants in New-ark seem to have died on a-ri-val.” <New Jersey voice> “Hey Joey, look, it’s another kind of greasy foam covering the sidewalk.”
K: I’m pretty sure Newark wasn’t on the list of cities.
R: And for good reason. It already wasn’t habitable for human life.
R: I loved the moment when the computer starts reporting the immanent breakdown of civilized life, and I’m just picturing everyone all over the world going “OH MY GOD!!! I NEED MY STARBUCKS!! AHAHAHA!” What’s it been, like 15 minutes?
H: Since the T-Mat broke down? At least a day. There was the rocket.
R: I was also very amused when the Ice Warrior came through the T-Mat on earth, and immediately started doing the truffle shuffle. “This here is my victory dance!”
E: And I was amused when everybody just stood there staring at him, rather them running for their lives, like they should have been. Considering the last thing that came through actually did kill a guy, you’d think they’d be a little more wary. But no.
R: Well, they had to wait until their security guards wearing their hair dryers showed up.
K: What is it with those horrible helmets.
P: Budget cuts.
R: Haven’t you heard, Lexan is all the rage in the future.
K: They’ve used it before. At least they’re consistent.
R: I’ve decided the cowardly Lt. is named Chicquennmann. <pronounced Chicken Man> It’s Belgian.
H: At least he finally shows some kind of…
R: He’s slightly more afraid of disappointing people in front of him than he is of dying.
P: So the plot appeared. Which I’m glad to see it moving the story along.
K: It is a 6-parter.
R: Oh, we know. The exciting waiting out in the airduct scene.
K: And the Doctor taking a week off.
H: But he was right…oh.
P: But he was lying down.
R: Yeah, after Jamie dragged him through those airducts, wanging his head on every single one of the bulk heads. <Jamie voice> “For some reason he won’t wake up. And the back of his head is bald.”
P: “And a bit swollen.”
R: “And soft.”
H: I think this episode actually moved at a pretty good clip. Especially in comparison to the padding in the previous episode. Not that there wasn’t padding, but it certainly moved at a good clip.
P: We certainly have easily walkable air ducts, that’s for sure. I wouldn’t have been able to distinguish them from a walkway by very much.
H: You have to crouch slightly.
R: As in so much of Doctor Who.
H: Doctor Who: Crouching slightly since 1963.
P: Doctor Who: Running through corridors and crouching slightly since 1963.
R: “Jamie, when I say crouch, crouch.”
K: Wow, not a lot happened in this one.
H: But it happened at a good clip.
E: There was a lot of breathing.
K: Too much breathing. That was so annoying.
E: Yeah, I was starting to get worried there.
R: Too much breathing? Say that to the head technician in the London office!
<groans>
K: Are we ready for final thoughts?
R: Not quite. For all I joked about this, the episode did move along at a pretty good clip.
H: Like I said.
R: Yeah. The padding was definitely still there, but they used it to better effect. To show off Zoe’s brains. Although I have to say, I don’t see how creatures with such unbelievably poor peripheral vision, and just general awareness, ever became the War Lords of Mars.
P: So, there’s the basic theory that animals only ever evolve the to the level they need in order to be competitive and then no further. So what happens is, as long as you’re out competing the other animals, there’s no need to evolve.
R: No wonder Mars is lifeless.
P: That would explain why Martians don’t need to be that good, or have great vision. No competition.
H: Also…
K: Bad costumes!
H: Also, remember they’re supposedly in some kind of atmosphere suit. When the Doctor examined their helmet way back in last season he noted that their was some complicated circuitry.
K: I’m beginning to think the other Ice Warriors story was better. But this one does have foam!
H: Now, final thoughts.
E: <Ice Warrior voice> “I have arrived on earth to inva- wait, what do I do?”
R: <Ice Warriors voice> “Operation ‘Nice Walk in the Woods’ as begun!”
A: Yeah, we pretty much covered all of it.
P: Let’s see.
K: You don’t think we pretty much covered all of it, apparently.
P: There’s nothing like sneaking across a room with a brightly lit up wall. Even for a guy with poor peripheral vision, that should have been pretty easy to spot.
H: He did see her when he turned around.
K: But he shot the other guy first. I saw the grate square.
<short discussion on what the Ice Warrior actually shot. I guess we’ll get confirmation next week>
P: Surprisingly I didn’t miss the Doctor much. It was only after you guys were mentioning that he took the week off that I noticed. Definitely was hurt by the soundtrack this week. I guess that’s it.
Cz: <heavy breathing>
E: Cz wins. Everyone else go home.
H: Ronelyn?
R: <Zoe> “At last, another woman who shares my cold and remorseless intellect!”
K: Hey, this episode actually passed the Bechdel Test!
P: What’s the what now?
A: Two women, both with names, have a conversation with each other that’s not about a guy.
H: To be fair, they were having a conversation about an Ice Warrior, so it depends on how you feel about it.
R: Oh come on! Ice Warriors are parthenogenic ovoviviparous reptiles
K: Okay. Anything else, Ronelyn.
H: It was nice that we got to see Zoe remind us of her photographic memory, for the first time in a long.
K: First time since earlier in this story right when they were going to fly the rocket.
H: Oh, right. Sorry.
K: Anyway. I MISSED THE DOCTOR. I’m disappointed when we have a Doctor Who episode without the Doctor. Zoe had some good bits. Um… coward guy had some good bits. Kelly is HOT! And… uh…
H: Had good bits?
K: Sure. And Foam! I love foam. Ice Warriors stomping around in foam is funny. But I have a really hard time taking these aliens seriously. They’re silly in this story. So, while this story has been fun, it’s a bit empty, so far a bit long, and not enough Doctor.
H: So most of what I remember of this story, to be perfectly honest, is the frolicking in the foam.
K: Me too.
H: It’s been a while since I’ve seen it. And, actually I’m enjoying it considerably more than I was expecting to. So hopefully that will continue. And now, as it traditional for this story, we must end with…
Everybody: <with hand wiggling> Woobawoobawoobawooba. Woobawoobawoobawooba.
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And there we have it, another episode down! Sometimes I find it hard to believe how little we have left to go…What about you readers? How do you feel about how we’ve been doing? Leave a comment and let us know! We’ll see you next week–until then, I remain
THE HISTORIAN
NEXT WEEK: THE SEEDS OF DEATH EPISODE 5
